During a Skype with Diana Leafe Christian, the author of Creating a Life Together, she really underscored how important NVC is. Even consensus decision-making can be held hostage by people who don’t want to agree. NVC is a way of making sure conflict is addressed at its roots, and addressing everyone’s basic needs are met. This was something she had changed in the book in releases in other languages, but not in the English version.
NVC training helps people to feel heard and understood. It helps people to communicate without coercion or hostility, and opens people to holding space for others. It was developed by Marshall Rosenberg in the 60s.
Nonviolent Communication (abbreviated NVC, also called Compassionate Communication or Collaborative Communication) is a communication process developed by Marshall Rosenberg beginning in the 1960s. It focuses on three aspects of communication: self-empathy (defined as a deep and compassionate awareness of one’s own inner experience), empathy (defined as listening to another with deep compassion), and honest self-expression (defined as expressing oneself authentically in a way that is likely to inspire compassion in others).
NVC is based on the idea that all human beings have the capacity for compassion and only resort to violence or behavior that harms others when they don’t recognize more effective strategies for meeting needs. Habits of thinking and speaking that lead to the use of violence (psychological and physical) are learned through culture. NVC theory supposes all human behavior stems from attempts to meet universal human needs and that theseneeds are never in conflict. Rather, conflict arises when strategies for meeting needs clash. NVC proposes that if people can identify their needs, the needs of others, and the feelings that surround these needs, harmony can be achieved.
While NVC is ostensibly taught as a process of communication designed to improve compassionate connection to others, it has also been interpreted as a spiritual practice, a set of values, a parenting technique, an educational method and a worldview.